Part of the reason you’ve been struggling to bounce back is because of the F word – yes Failure. You’ve made up your mind that your failures and your past are stopping you from being, doing and having what God has called you to. The reality though is God will use what you’ve grown through once you recognize the power of your experiences. In this episode Tiffany is giving you a process and tools to begin to do just that.
Remember, you can not conquer what you refuse to call out and confront.
Hey beacon, welcome home to your bounce back blueprint community Podcast, where you are challenged to be do and have God’s best. As you thrive on your journey from setback to success. I’m your bounce back guide, Tiffany Huff-Strothers. And I’ll be guiding you on the journey by sharing tips, tools, and the T on how I was able to bounce back from escaping death, healing from heartbreak and finding hope in homelessness. And then I wrote an award winning book all about it, and shout out to God, ever since I was courageous enough to share my story. My life and the lives of women around the world have been forever changed. And as a member of the bounce back blueprint community, I’m called to teach you to do the same. So grab your journal, and let’s build this blueprint. Hey, begin. I hope you have your journal. Because I’m ready to dig in today, and start building this blueprint. We are starting a new series today, all about redefining you. And if you missed the last episode, Episode 71, can you introduce me to your future self that I strongly encourage you to go back and listen to it because this next series is all about giving you the tools that you need, right helping you to redefine how you think about certain things, so that you can begin to embrace and embody your future self now. And so I thought the most appropriate place to start with this process was to redefine failure. Yes, I said it redefine failure, let’s, let’s just be real. This is the bounce back blueprint podcast. The premise of this podcast is all about having the clarity, the courage and the commitment to use and be used right by God, where your worst setback creates an opportunity for you to make an impact. And if God sees fit, to also make an income. And so I really want you to give yourself permission, right now in this moment to release your failures, right. And these are failures that you’ve decided or failures, not failures that anybody else has put a stamp on, I want you to start with those you’ve decided have been or are failures that you have on this little list or written down in your little black book, or those things that rise up and remind you why you can’t be or do or have something because of where you failed in the past. Now, I want you to start with yourself first. Because in doing so you will likely have aha moments about other people, or situations that arose that based on what other people thought, or what society has said, you consider failures as well. But I want you to start with yourself, right because we are focusing on you introducing your future self to you first. And if you are struggling to redefine your failures, then you will struggle to embody your entire identity. Okay, and I’m not talking about you pulling something from the sky about who’s you will be and what you will do. And all of the luxurious things you will have. I am speaking specifically to the woman that God has called and created you to be right to the woman that God has told you, you will become the woman who he has and is working through you to us, right? The woman he has begun to transform the woman who he decided was a beacon, right, you are a beacon. And so I want to take you back to our founding scripture for not only this podcast, but for the work that I do. It’s out of Isaiah 61. I’m not going to read it to you in its entirety. But I’m going to give you verses one through four maybe. And I want you to listen intentionally with this because this chapter is Isaiah, which I strongly encourage you to read the entirety of Isaiah 61. And in fact, I encourage you to begin to meditate on Isaiah 61 because it’s so good. And it speaks directly to God using your quote unquote failures, right, your setbacks, your challenges, to not only bless others to not only impact others, but in fact, to change the world. Okay. Did you catch that your failures and your willingness to use them as God intended you to, will change the world.
This is going to require you to know and embody your future self. So let’s dig into this and start doing the work to redefine failure. So here we go. Isaiah 61. starting with verse one, I’m going to read through verse four, the spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. This is exactly who God is telling you are right, this is God’s speaking to your future self. And if you read this in first person, you’re speaking to an introducing your future self. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives, and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor, and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn and provide for those who grieve in Zion to bestow on them a crown of the beauty, instead of ashes, the oil of joy, instead of mourning, and a garment of praise, instead of a spirit of despair. Are you hearing this, they will be called oaks of righteousness, of planting of the Lord, for the display of his splendor. So what I need you to hear is that because of the Broken Heart you’ve had, you are able to help bind up the brokenhearted because of what you were held captive to. He is sending you to proclaim freedom now that you are free, because you were in darkness as a prisoner. He has called and anointed you to release from darkness. The prisoners are you hearing this, he has sent you to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor. And as you do these things, did you hear that they will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord’s splendor you will build the kingdom by embracing yourself by redefining your failure, and being a blessing to others. And then verse four says they will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated, they will renew, renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations. Are you hearing this, when you begin to do what the Lord anointed you to do, you will change people’s lives. And in doing so they will become stronger, they will be a display of his splendor, meaning God is building his reputation in and through you. And then they will rebuild the ancient ruins, they will transform this world. They will transform ancient ruins we talk in generations of Ruin, that you have been called and created to support the real rebuilding of but it is only because he has anointed you based on what you’ve grown through with him, right? And so you’ve got to be willing to do the work to redefine your faith or excuse me to redefine your failures. So that when you are reading and meditating and memorizing Isaiah 61, you can fully embrace it, you can eat it, you can consume it and swallow it, and it becomes real for you. Right? You’ve got to know that you know that, you know, like it says in Isaiah 61 one that the spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon you because the Lord has anointed you. Right? You’ve got to know that. And so I want you to get your journal if you don’t have it already. Yes, I’m telling you, again, to get your journal because we are building this blueprint this week. And of course, there are some questions that I would love. And I am super excited to coach you through right? You got to get your journal. Alright. So in order for you to redefine your failure, and really begin to align with Isaiah 61, I have three questions to ask you. Actually, these three questions you are going to ask yourself, but before we dig into those questions, I want you to spend some time right now. Writing down those failures. I want you to write down those struggles, those setbacks, those things that you have swept under the rug, or worked really hard to rise above that nobody knows about and you’re okay with nobody knowing about Those things that if you’re honest, have made you stronger, more resilient, and probably required you to stand on your faith even more, and pray and cry more than you ever have in your life, write those things down. You know that I am a firm believer that we cannot conquer what we refuse to call out and confront. And so right now is your opportunity to call out the failures that have been weighing you down, that’s speak to you in the back of your mind when you have opportunities, or when someone calls on you to do or be something and you want to, but those thoughts are running through your minds about this thing, write those things down. And it could be anything, it could be something that happened this week, it could be something that happened to you and third grade 10th grade your senior year in college that still kind of haunts you. You know, I shared on an interview I had last week about how, during the time when I was in this abusive relationship, I was in college, and I had been afforded an opportunity to have a corporate internship every summer, because of a scholarship that I had, that was for four years. And I was hired at one of the biggest corporations here in Pittsburgh. And in the second year, things with our relationship got so bad, so bad, that I was constantly late, I was constantly calling off, I was embarrassed about what was happening in my life. And I was trying to maintain this facade. So I was constantly making up these stories to tell my supervisor, so that she wouldn’t suspect that I was in fact in an abusive relationship, hoping that these lies and this facade would help me to maintain my position. And ultimately, what ended up happening was my experience, which was supposed to last for years, and ultimately end with me being hired by the Corporation. And it was after that summer, because the supervisor recommended that I not be brought back. Because my attendance was spotty. When I was there, I did excellent work. But me getting there and getting there on time. And being focused a lot of times has become a challenge. And so when I had this interview this week, there was actually another woman being interviewed, and she was part of that program, as well, right. And we were both speaking about our experiences with domestic violence. And I said to her, you know, you probably don’t remember we were in this program together. But I didn’t get to finish. And I shared that with her. And that was a failure that I carried around for many, many years. In fact, she was or the women on that interview were the first who I ever shared that experience with and why it ended. I had to conquer that failure. It wasn’t something that necessarily haunted me constantly. But it is something that I thought about often, it is something that if I wasn’t careful, could rise up in times when I feel like things aren’t going their best with this entrepreneurial journey. And I think about, you know, should I get a job and then I consider, I could have a multiple six figure job at sed Corp had I not allowed that to happen. But instead, I was willing to not only call it out, but confront it. And I confronted it, both privately and publicly during that interview. And so those are the things that I want you to consider, maybe you don’t have the exact same story. But you have a story about a time when things didn’t go the way you planned. Maybe you contribute it to them, maybe it was something else going on in your life, maybe it was a decision that you made or you did not make.
But those are the failures I want you to consider and begin to write down in your journal. And once you have exhausted that list, and this can be very emotional, I should say, right? So give yourself grace and give yourself the space if you need to, to pause this recording so that you can work through these and get them down on paper. And then once you are able to do that, I don’t care if it’s one failure. I don’t care if it’s a 1002 failure once you have called out what you need to confront. These are the three questions I want you to ask. And I want To ask them for the most significant of the failures on your list, I want you to ask yourself first, what did I learn from this experience? I can tell you for sure. What I know now and have learned from that experience that I just shared with you, in hindsight is that honesty is always the best policy. Right? Had I been honest, in that season, it would have completely changed the trajectory of my life. And this is not about sugarcoating, what is right. This is about the lessons that we are receiving the blessings that come from these experiences that we have to grow through. Now you may have five failures written down, and you may have learned three things from each failure, that’s fine, write them all down. Because this is how you are going to begin to identify the brokenhearted that you are to bind up the prisoners that you are to release from darkness. It comes from, oftentimes the darkness and the prisons, and the broken heart that you yourself have experienced. Right. So that’s question number one. What have I learned from these experiences? What did these failures teach me? And these questions are actually the beginning of your process of failing forward. So when you have a challenge come up, or when something doesn’t go your way, moving forward. Before you berate yourself, you can create some space, take a deep breath, and work through these questions again. Second question is, how has my life been transformed because of these experiences, and what I learned? And so, again, these questions build on each other. Now that you’ve learned that honesty is the best policy that the truth will set you free. How has your life transformed? One of the ways that this transformed my life is when we had children, I decided that I was always going to be honest with my children, and that I was going to have an open door policy with them. Because I wanted them to know that they could get the truth from me. They didn’t have to go seeking it from someone else. No matter what the topic was, the situation or circumstance was right, I was committed to having courageous conversations with my children no matter what. So that’s one of the ways that this experience and what I learned from it transformed my life. Now this may look different from you, perhaps one of the things you feel you failed at is that you felt bankruptcy, right? You had some challenges with stewarding your money. And maybe one of the lessons you learn is that you need to be more intentional about how much debt you incur, right, maybe one of the lessons you learned is that you needed to learn more about financial management and wealth building. And so this may have transformed your life and that maybe you operate with cash only. Maybe you’ve decided not to have credit cards. Maybe you shifted and began a career or got a certification in financial psychology or literacy, right? These are the things I want you to consider. How has what you learned and what you experienced, transformed your life. Again, this is how the people in Isaiah 61 that you’re called to, are going to begin to rebuild the ancient ruins. Because you are embracing your future self you are getting to know your future self as you are answering these questions. And then the last question is, how can I impact others? With what I’ve learned and how I’ve transformed? Right? How can what I’ve grown through shift the lives of someone else? How can in the words of Isaiah 61 I use these lessons and my transformation to bind up the brokenhearted? Right? How can I use the lessons and transformations to bestow upon someone a crown of beauty instead of ashes? What beauty has come out of the ashes of what you have been considering a failure for weeks or months or years or decades? Now is the time for you to redefine failure. So That you can step into the woman that God has called and created you to be, and begin to have the impact that he has called you to have. It is written in the word, you are going to impact people, and they are going to change the world. Not just for today, but for generations. There is a shift happening right now, and you are called to be part of it. And in doing so, is going to require you to redefine your failure, it’s going to require you to consistently fail forward, is going to require you to consistently answer these questions, call out and confront what you need to conquer. Right? The word says that we are more than conquerors. And I’m excited. I’m excited about the shift in this season. I’m excited about you choosing to redefine failure right now. And I’m excited to help you. If you need support through this journey. You know, a lot comes out of this process, right? Once you start to answer these questions and call out these failures and do the work to grow through and fail forward. It can be challenging, and if we’re honest, sometimes it’s so challenging that we want to stop. But in this season, it is time for you to be more of a conqueror than it is for you to be comfortable. In this season, it is time for you to start trampling in those spaces where you have been tiptoeing in this season, it is time for you to stop auditioning for the roles that God has already assigned you. Because you are afraid that your failure and your past have made you an outcast. This is the season of the outcast. This is the year of the Lord’s favor, as the scripture says and it is time for you to show approval, and I am excited to support you, I am excited to be on this journey with you. If you are ready to do the work, and you want to have a guide and coach help you along the way, I am your girl. I am excited and look forward to hearing from you. You can grab the link in the show notes to schedule your breakthrough session so that we can have a mat a meeting of the minds and really work together to develop a plan for how I can help you begin to do the work to day to redefine your failures and begin to make the impact and the income that God has called and created you to stop telling yourself you can’t do it because of what happened in the past. Stop telling yourself that you may not be able to do it well. It is written and it is so and I’m going to leave you with this. God is not going to play you but if you think God can’t use what you’ve grown through, I promise you are playing yourself. Be blessed.